Leap of Faith.

I'm a girl that overthinks everything. I think about all of the things I want to do like travel the world, get that tattoo I have been talking about forever and make decisions based entirely on the things that I want to do, no one else. My thoughts are always bogged down with tiny details and questions about whether or not it will work and if I'm silly to think I could actually last in a foreign country away from my friends and family for any serious length of time.  Almost as though I'm paralyzed by the thought that it won't work out. So I want to move to Australia? How am I going to find a job? Where will I live? How will I find friends? Will it be too hard to be away from my family? So what, Shannon. 

I think it only takes one person or experience to completely change your outlook on things. I have my person, maybe I have two, but I have realized a few things. Life is short and we only get one of them. Being paralyzed by this fear or striking out and not succeeding is stupid. I think the best lessons are the hardest, the best times are the smallest moments and the best part of life is the wild adventures and the most outrageous leaps of faith. I have decided that I want those adventures before I can't have them anymore. I want to learn from and experience the world in it's entirety. I want to backpack through parts of Europe and then stay in a gorgeous hotel in Monaco. I want to play with little kids who have nothing but their smiles and sip champagne in an outdoor hot tub in a hotel in Vegas. I think the meaning of life may be living in the moment and experiencing every feeling we can at every moment. 

There is no promise that anything will work out, but that's okay. No promise that I will find what I'm looking for, hell, I'm not even sure what I'm looking for or if I will ever find it. I just don't want to be the girl that could have done great things and didn't. I'm constantly questioning what I want to do and how to be successful but I don't even know what my definition of successful is. Is it sitting at a desk, working a million hours and never feeling the sun on my face? I mean really feeling the sun on my face. You know the warm penetrating rays that feel as though they're warming up your heart and turning the world into a much happier place. If successful means I can't feel that then I don't want it. 

I want to love and be loved in return. I want to learn everything I can from everyone I can. I want to dance, laugh, drink wine and make my dreams a reality. I don't know what I'm going to do from here, but I like it. I want to feel lost and I want to find my way through mistakes, adventures and most of all an incredible leap of faith.

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